Why Stillness Is a Good Teacher

Stillness did not come easy to me, and to be honest, it still does not at times. But this has helped me see how good a teacher it can be.

I used to keep my head very much “in the game”. Every day was a constant sprint from one thing to the next, sometimes multiple things at once. Even though I have changed to a slower pace of life and a career that promotes peace and stillness, I still see the legacy effect of a life lived in fight mode.

Fight or Flight vs Rest and Digest

It is in this fight or flight mode that the power of stillness really shows up.

We spend our days in either fight or flight mode, or rest and digest mode. It can be that we flit between the two. In fact, that is quite healthy. You would not want to be faced with danger and be in rest and digest. Equally, you would not want to be laid in bed at night ready to fight off a threat.

But it is in how we are dominated that decides if we can find the answers in our lives.

The Nervous System and Modern Life

The sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight) is one that keeps you very focused on your goal. We get there at all costs. But it is often blinkered and lacks the full picture, or even the clarity, to think adaptively.

On the other hand, the parasympathetic nervous system (rest and digest) keeps us feeling creative and in flow.

In the sympathetic nervous system, we find ourselves being very reactive. Perhaps it means we act first and think later. The trouble in the modern world is that we have a lot of stimulus. So we have a lot of action happening.

Sometimes it can be a long time before we are able to stop and think. By that time, who knows how many things have jumped out at us. Trying to find the source of anything would be like searching for a needle in a haystack.

Why Stillness Is Such a Good Teacher

This is where stillness comes in, and why it is such a good teacher.

This is also where you will find the most resistance, especially if you identify a little more with the sympathetic nervous system. You see, the mind and body are trying to keep you alive. So if it feels threatened, it will keep you in fight or flight until the threat has passed.

But this modern world keeps those threats present almost 24/7.

When you throw in the fact that we churn, ruminate, and overthink, we end up in a mental loop that never stops.

Creating Safety in the Body

If we can break through this resistance and make the mind and body see that it is safe, we are able to find the space and clarity to know exactly what we need to do.

How complicated and time consuming is it to shift into the parasympathetic, I hear you ask?

Not even remotely complicated or time consuming.

Why do we not do it more? I have no idea. But let us start today with this simple practice.

A Simple Stillness Practice

Take a moment out. Set a timer if you like. You will need just a few minutes.

Find a space away from distraction. Whatever and whoever you have around you can wait a few minutes.
Get comfortable, sat down, not laid down. Try to be upright.
Close your eyes.
Breathe in through your nose for a count of 4.
Pause for a second.
Breathe out through your nose for a count of 8, nice and slow.

If nose breathing is a struggle, do the same through pursed lips.

On this breath, you want to breathe into the belly, not the chest and shoulders.

Repeat this cycle 10 times.

As you do it, focus on the count, not the thoughts.

Then allow your breath to return to normal, but remain in this stillness and let thoughts come up without judgement.

An added step is to journal what came up, again without judgement.

Why This Works

This is the basics of resistance breathing, where we make it a little trickier for the body to breathe.

In this mode, we activate the vagus nerve and the parasympathetic nervous system. By breathing into the belly, you are massaging the organs involved in digestion, and so we activate rest and digest.

Making Stillness a Habit

Now, one and done will not cut it.

Keep this up 1–2 times a day for a couple of weeks and you will see the benefit. Keep it going for several weeks and you will have your habit set up.

Stillness is a good teacher.

I cannot tell you what it will teach you, but it always has the answers.

Why Stillness is a Good Teacher